she.....

I wrote this about a million times yet my heart is bleeding. WHY?!. I write this down till my heart and soul cries for solace yet there is no help offered. This heart of mine shall never capitulate perpetually. NEVER!!!! No matter how much you try to eschew me this vain heart of my does not seem to be accede to let you go. Your smile so breathtaking until my heart could not bare your beauty that it became turgid. I try to disregard you but I fail every time. That smile of yours like a lotus so exquisite I could not stop gazing at you like the sky, so calm and peaceful…….
At this point my mind is absent ….. searching for you at the bottom of my heart. I do not even know if I ought to tell you because you had said no. this my heart could not take “ IT HURTS! “, I want to tell you but my lips would not shunt. Do you not understand how I feel? You go on liking someone else when she does not even love you! Yet I am here dying begging to be by your side no matter what but you do not seem to concede the fact that you are a fool, you are just contradicting your self my love





we are not sure of sorrow,
and joy was never sure,
today will die tomorrow;
time stoops to mans lure;
and love grown faint and regretful,
sighs, and with eyes forgetful,
weeps that no loves endure,


from too much love of living,
from hope and fear set free,
I shall never disregard you my love,
Thou art my hearts songs and cadence,
The lines of thy love,
Disregard not of my love, my beloved,
For day and night is ours,
Yet lonely shall I stray, my shadow as my cohort,
let alone shall i lay, this cadaver of mine reminiscent of my pain.


When I first saw you my heart trembled I was breathless, speechless. Yet I never knew that this was love. The most powerful feeling. How imprudent of me! How could I not realize it then, every time I looked at you my mind would spin, my heart would bleed profusely and yet I could not understand my feeling for you. Why did it hurt so much?! Why did you decline this offer? What was absent in me that had made you decline? What did he have so much greater than in me?
My palms became numb like it was frozen like the whole weather around me was cold snow…… I am not envious about your love but the fact that you had put me away. Every thing that I have written here is just what I do not get . This feeling of love has made me so unearthly. You were my first love and as they say ‘ you will for eternity reminisce thy first love’ yes you may have made me weak and sick of love yet I shall never disregard thy. Like ‘under the green wood tree’, your declination has made me vigoureux by heart this soul shall never end for thee as a love is my drug and I shall never let go for the sun shines above this heavens gold an this rain pours my delicate love out and when you kiss thy beloved it shall rain and when u dance under my love, this compassionate love of mine so fragile, thou art shall never fade because I shall protect you from harm…….dance under me, your beauty is the key, your beauty is my lock, your beauty is the heart as I only see what is inside you, you may look like a atrocious yet it is your heart that counts……so shall it be the chest in my heart locked away and your love, your acquiescence to my heart, that is when this bloody heart shall break free like a pigeon so free flying in the vast blue sky so wide that it is endless to no point my destination would never come to a dead end. Yet I am convinced that this love……………….shall come to an end. Alas I had written it this story of mine or should I call it as my valentine gift to you my love…..